Hey friends, welcome back to the Birthing Bestie blog, where we talk about real topics pertaining to pregnancy, birth, postpartum, motherhood, doula work, and just real life. Here on the blog, we don’t shy away from talking about the hardships of life. Instead, we embrace them with open arms.

Today, I want to talk to the mamas who are expecting—whether it’s your first child, your fifth, or anywhere in between. Specifically, if you’re choosing to deliver with a care provider in a hospital setting, these tips can help you open lines of communication and have more productive conversations about your birth preferences.

Prefer to watch? Here’s the video for you, Mama!

3 Tips for Better Communication with Your Care Provider

When it comes to discussing your birth plan, how you ask questions is just as important as the questions themselves. To ensure you feel heard and respected, here are three key strategies:

1. Lead with Information

Before asking your provider a question, start by demonstrating that you’ve done your research. Whether you’ve spoken with a doula, taken a childbirth class, or read up on the topic independently, make it clear that your question is informed. This shows your care provider that you’re an active participant in your care and helps establish a more balanced conversation.

2. Ask Open-Ended Questions

Avoid yes-or-no questions, as they can shut down the conversation quickly. Instead, ask questions that encourage discussion. For example, rather than saying, “Do you allow delayed cord clamping?” try, “What are your thoughts on waiting until the cord is white before clamping?” This approach gives your provider an opportunity to explain their stance and allows for a more meaningful exchange.

Additionally, be mindful of wording that diminishes your autonomy. Stay away from phrases like “Will you let me…” or “Do you allow…” You are in charge of your birth decisions, and medical advice is just that—advice. Instead, frame your questions with curiosity and confidence.

3. Request Documentation in Your Chart

If you’ve made a decision about a specific aspect of your birth plan, ask your provider to note it in your medical chart. This ensures that all members of your care team are aware of your preferences. If you’re still exploring options, you can also ask for additional resources to continue your research rather than feeling pressured to make any decisions on the spot.

Putting It Into Practice

For example, if you want to ensure delayed cord clamping is part of your birth plan, you might say:

“I’ve been researching the benefits of delayed cord clamping, and I’d really like to wait until the cord is white and has stopped pulsating. What are your thoughts on that? Is this something you can note in my chart?”

This phrasing keeps the conversation open while affirming your decision.

Keep Me Posted!

I hope these tips help you navigate discussions with your care provider and empower you to advocate for your birth preferences. If you need help framing specific questions or discussing options, I’m always here for you– Just reach out.

You can get in touch on Instagram @ebbirthing or email me at ebbirthing@gmail.com. I’m cheering you on, mama—you’ve got this! Let me know how your next appointment goes, and keep advocating for the birth experience you want and deserve.

Until next time, mamas.