The 3 P’s of Cultivating a Positive Birth Mindset

Getting into a positive birth mindset is a crucial part of preparing for labor and delivery. In this Birthing Bestie Blog, we’re dissecting the 3 P’s of Cultivating a Positive Birth Mindset so that you can move negative feelings and emotions before, during and after birth.

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The 3 P’s of Cultivating a Positive Birth Mindset

Hey, hey, Mama!

Today we’re talking about something that is super important for birth… BUT can really be applied to any aspect of motherhood and life:


Or, more specifically, birth mindset.

Our mindset, in general, is so important to consider how we live our day-to-day lives, including how we think and feel going into birth.

Being able to put your “blinders” on so you can focus on such a monumental time and task, such as birth, is crucial. Even during pregnancy, and especially as you inch closer and closer to your delivery, protecting your mental space is, in my opinion, THE most important thing to consider.

So how do we establish a good mindset? Whether that be for birth, pregnancy, or motherhood?

Understanding the expectations you have for yourself and others, as well as what expectations others have for you is a big piece of the puzzle. Knowing those expectations, setting boundaries around them, and communicating all of these things with everyone on your birth team will help with getting everyone on the same.

Communication in all areas of life is key, and in this phase of life, it is more important than ever!

So now that you’ve taken the time to communicate your expectations and boundaries, let’s talk about those 3 P’s.

Whether you’re in pregnancy, birth, or motherhood, when you fall into a negative mental space, this is the framework to practice so that you can move into a positive birth mindset.

The 3 P’s = Processing, Planning, and Positivity.


When you start to notice those fears, anxieties or negative feelings creep in, it’s important to recognize and work through them.

Make sure you acknowledge those feelings, because trust me, mama, if you try to ignore them or shove them down, they WILL find a way to resurface during labor. And if you don’t process them and practice these 3 P’s before birth, they will be much harder to move through during birth.

Some good ways to process your feelings can include:

Verbally processing – If you know me well, you know this is my preferred method of processing 😉 Whether talking out loud to yourself,  to your partner, or a trusted friend, verbally processing can be a great way to get those feelings out of your head and off your chest. Sometimes, when we hear ourselves say something out loud, it helps us better understand how we feel and why we feel that way.

Journaling – I, personally, was not a believer of journaling. It seemed like a lot of forced effort, but the truth is, once you allow yourself to let the thoughts flow, the amount of energy it actually takes is minimal. Journaling your feelings is a great way to get them out, without fear of judgment from anyone. It’s just you, your thoughts, and some paper. And sometimes, it can make all the difference.

Prayer – This may not be for everyone; if it’s not, that’s okay! Whether you’re praying to God or another higher being, prayer can be an excellent way to get those emotions out and surrender them to a higher power. 

The most important aspect of this “P” (processing) is that you acknowledge the feeling and get them out to someone or something!

2. Planning

Now THIS is the “P” that you will come back to time and time again. The “Planning” is where we decide how we move through the emotions that have been processed.

This is where you put in the work, and it takes practice. This is where you’re going to fine-tune and lean into what will help you shift your mindset during birth.

These tools that you’ll rely on to get out of that negative space can include:

Breathwork – Getting out of your head and into your body by focusing on your breath. Whether you’re counting your inhale/exhale pattern, feeling the sensation of the breath itself, or directing that breath to a specific place in your body, breathwork is a tool that really can make all the difference in birth.

Meditation/prayer – Another way to quiet the mind and release the negative feeling. Shifting your focus and letting go!

Affirmations – These might not be for everyone… and if you’re giving affirmations a try, remember that they do not have to be super “birthy” affirmations. They can be as simple as “I can do it.” 4 words. That’s it! Repeat it again and again. I CAN DO IT.

Education – Something that I hope you’re all here in this community for: educating yourself. Knowing the “why” behind the birth process and reminding yourself about options for everything can be so reassuring.

Pep talks – I’m always here to be your cheerleader! Sometimes you need a pep talk either to yourself (“I can do it!”) or from another trusted person on your birth team to remind you that YOU CAN DO IT!

3. Positivity

Once you put that planning in place and practice those tools, it’s time to move forward. You can’t dwell on the negative. I know that sometimes that’s easier said than done, and even if you don’t necessarily feel the positivity with your whole being, choose move forward with positivity anyway. Put your mind in a positive space and the rest will follow. And if you need to, go back to that second P!

This process of the 3 P’s is “rinse and repeat”. Go back again and again until you’ve officially cultivated that positive birth mindset.

And remember, Mama, these 3 P’s can be used at any point in life… pregnancy, birth, motherhood and more!

Next time you find yourself falling into a negative mind space, give these at try and let me know how it goes.

And don’t forget: YOU CAN DO IT! You’ve got this, Mama!

2023 © Erin Brier Birthing